Staying motivated for weight loss/beauty during a pandemic…

It’s been way too long since I’ve posted any cute clothes or make up tutorials on here, and I’m sad about it. It’s not that beauty and fashion no longer interests me, or that I’m too busy…far from it. It’s just been depressing during the quarantine this past year, making it difficult to be inspired. I also had a lot of personal problems right at the start of the pandemic last winter and feeling motivated to stay thin, to stay fashionable, or to follow the latest beauty trends has been far from my mind. Covid fatigue is a real thing but for me I was already tired of it from the beginning…

It all started when I lost my job as a stylist apprentice when hair salons shut down in Toronto last March. Shortly after that, I broke up with my “on again, off again” lover a second time, because he didn’t feel serious enough about us to date through a pandemic. I lost hope that I could be in a lasting relationship and doubted myself heavily… My career prospects had disappeared in a blink and just as fast, so did my love life die. And it all really hurt and stunned me. Nothing seemed important anymore and it was hard to keep my own identity. The world in shut down mode no longer made the need for stylish clothes or gorgeous make-up or hair looks in demand. The new routine for everyone would be comfy sweat pants and days of staying home unemployed. Add to that my daily break-up recovery routine and it was suicide. I would struggle daily for the next year to find ways to cope with the changes in my life.

During the first half of 2020, I was bored out of my mind, eating more and gaining weight. I had to force myself not wear sweat pants during the day because it made me feel too depressed and purposeless. I even stopped wearing makeup for a while. But then summer came and the pressure to go to the beach and wear bikinis was too great. I lost weight, got into fashion and beauty again. Things were kind of normal for a while. And in the fall, I was still active getting out, and even dated around a bit. Then came the holidays and New Years and another winter 2021 lockdown in Toronto. Any progress I had made came to a halt. Eating at home became a past time again and I am now 10 pounds heavier than what I usually am. I don’t feel pretty, and I don’t feel like myself. This is when I know I have to lose the weight again and get back to feeling like a beauty professional. Yes, there is a Pandemic going on, but no, I am not going to let it stop me from being myself!

Ending my Personal Pandemic: Goals

• Self care is important, more so than ever. It’s easy to go days without grooming because no one is looking or caring, but a self care routine is connected to who I am. I will do it for my own sake and sanity. I am trying to put being lovely back into my daily routine.
• Buy new pretty clothes: I have no where to go, and am already stocked in fab clothes from my years of working in fashion retail! But I recently found a gap in my wardrobe collection when I saw I had nothing to work out in! I then shopped online for cute work-out clothes. It helps motivate me to work out at home more often.
• Find things to do daily to keep busy and not be tempted to eat out of boredom. I now have time to paint again (I went to art college), write and research new fashion trends. But even if I don’t do anything productive like the activities above, binge watching a show, playing video games, anything to pass time is still good. As long as it gets me through my unemployed day.
• Stay away from alcohol or at least try not to have it regularly. I find it affects my energy levels the next day and makes me have very light sleeps.
• Tracking my weight: It’s really hard to tell if I have gained weight and by the time I visually notice, I will already have gone off track. Using the bathroom daily scale seems like an anorexic habit, but it really helps me stay focused and not indulge too much.
• Knowing why I want to lose weight: Skinny is not always beautiful, and not for everyone. But for me, I am the most happy, comfortable and confident when I am a few pounds lighter. My clothes fit better, my face is less puffy and round…and it just makes sense. Acceptance of my body also includes acceptance of my true goals when it comes to body image.

In conclusion: feeling pretty can be hard. I don’t think anybody wake up in the morning with birds chirping at their windows and bows in their hair. It takes a lot work that a pandemic and quarantine can thwart; but at the end of the day, it’s just another excuse for not living up to my standards of being. It’s never too late to turn around.