My mother had 30 pairs of black pumps…the obsession continues…

Women and shoes.   Forever together, forever a slave to each other yet a fashion MUST–is this a good thing?  I myself try hard to stay away from obsessing over this fashion item.  I mean, I like shoes, but I don’t own fifty pairs of them, that’s for sure.  There is something about fussing over shoes that connotes a certain feminine shallowness about it.   I understand women’s interest in finding great footwear, but throughout my life, I have always fought its grip to be able to be seen as a thinking, creative woman (maybe even for feminist reasons).  Why should we justify spending half of our paychecks on a fashion item that on most days, is not practical enough to wear?

Take from culture: Carrie, a character from the tv show Sex and the City.  She was a role-model I had during my late twenties.  An independent urban spirit with a designer shoe addiction, Carrie was still able to hold her own; career-wise as a writer, and socially with her group of friends.  This is only on tv, but then I see how girl friends of mine collect shoes, and remember how my own mother had around 30 pairs of similar looking black pumps, and I wonder now if this image of women finding self-esteem and worth from fabulous footwear is actually closer to reality than I thought.

Carrie Bradshaw is considered a fashion icon in terms of heeled designer glam.  But she paid steeply for it in many ways...
Carrie Bradshaw is considered a fashion icon in terms of heeled designer glam. But she paid steeply for it in many ways…

On this note, I have a pair of black stiletto pumps that I have been trying to “break in” for a year now.  Why do high heels have to be such a pain to wear?  It’s not my first pair of heels, but this is my first stiletto pump.  I’m used to clunky heels on boots, but stiletto pumps are a totally different animal.  Buy pumps with room for your toes and the back heel slides off.  Get a pair that are tight, and your toes feel like they are being murdered when you walk.  I got a size smaller because the salesman said that leather only gets bigger when it stretches, and the smaller size was the only one that didn’t lift in the heel when I walked.  He said I would have to break them in…and that was a year ago.  Til recently, these pumps have mocked me when I looked at them, they were so difficult to break in.

These pumps nearly killed me.  They hurt so bad in the toe area.  They are about a three inch heel!
These pumps nearly killed me. They hurt so bad in the toe area. They are about a four inch heel!

And guess what?  I actually conquered them! It took me a week of pain, but when the event I wanted them for came, I wore them all night beautifully, without any pain at all, and they went great with my outfit.  I must say black pointy pumps are a fashion staple.  But have I been converted to a shoe junkie?  Do I see shoes as an obsessesion worthy piece of fashion?  Well, let’s just say I’m now a slight believer, yet I still advocate for a modest shoe collection, if possible!

How I broke in my leather pumps:

1. It is true, leather stretches.  Which means getting a pair of pumps with space to move can be more hazardous to wear when it stretches and keeps slipping off your feet.  You can buy heel huggers, but they only work on tight heels anyways…so buy a snug size, and try to break them in yourself.

2.  What I did was use rubbing alcohol on the shoes.  I applied it many times with a cotton swab, inside and out. And them I wore them around the house to stretch them.  This was probably the most uncomfortable part of breaking them in.  It took me several days of doing this at night time whenever I was home.

3.  Condition and re-condition with coconut oil:  I noticed when leather is “dry”, it doesn’t keep it’s stretch.  So after using rubbing alcohol on the shoes to stretch it, unwind the leather by applying a bit of oil on a cotton swab all over the shoes.  Consesquently, you can also focus on areas that are still too tight, like I did with the toe box.  Mine were still too tight, so I repeated steps 2 and 3 a few times over the course of a week.

4.  Wear them outside for a practice run:  Bring back up shoes in case they irritate you in a way you didn’t expect them to while out.  I test ran my pumps while having lunch with some friends.  It was a good idea, because apparently, I had to practice walking in stilettos.  It is as hard as it looks! I had nearly wiped out twice! 🙂  But all in all, enjoy your great shoes, but don’t obsess!

 

The “I look great with no effort” Make-Up

I’ve noticed there are a lot of make-up tutorials out there for all kinds of make-up looks.  Day looks, night looks, Halloween looks, work look, and wedding looks, but I was thinking, what is a girl supposed to do when she is having an errand day, such as doing groceries, or going to coin laundry?  There is no look for this that is appropriate.  Work make-up looks too formal, and fun flirty make-up looks too dolly for something mundane like dropping off library books. But not wearing make-up at all is dowdy and sloppy. There is a lot of pressure on women to constantly look put together, even when going to the post office.  But we don’t live in the past era where put together house wives in pearls dominated the general image of women in public.  Now, a heavily made up face on a woman in a supermarket looks slightly out of place to me.  Also there is judgement on busy mothers with young children, from on lookers who think to themseves: where does she find the time to powder her nose and coat her lashes, when she has two screaming children she should be attending to?  (This is not a fair judgement, but something we want to avoid, none-the-less)  So what to do?  I present to you, a formula for the everyday look.  It’s about balance.  Wearing enough make-up to not look sloppy, and yet not looking like a glamour addict, make-up addicted bimbo.  The “I didn’t just roll out of bed” look, also known as the “I am put together in an effortless way” look.

1.  Tinted moisturizer.  I have dry skin, so in the morning my skin is begging for moisture anyways.  I make my own tinted moisturizer with my bb cream/foundation base mixed with a dab of face cream.  This thins out foundation and gives it a more sheer coverage, helping to minimize imperfections, but not to cover-up the subtle textures of a natural skin face. Then follow with a light dusting of face powder.  I stress a light dusting because if you heavily put on powder, then it defeats the whole effortless look.  It will be over done.

2.  Groom your brows with a brow brush and a bit of brow liner.  Just a bit.

3. Then apply eye shadow, but no liner.  Get a semi-fine shadow brush, and use any colour shadow to smoothly line the contours of your eyes. I say any colour is fine because once a shadow is applied, its edges are diffused naturally, and doesn’t cause any bold stark lines.  It gives your eyes a pop, without being too noticeable.  Also it acts as base powder for your mascara to not smudge against the base lids of your eyes.

4.  Mascara is the key to looking done up, but not over done.  Without mascara, girls really do look like they just rolled out of bed and slapped on some make-up.  But mascara makes you look awake, without looking too dolled up.

5.  Tinted lip balm!  I love this stuff.  It doesn’t cover up your lips, or add sticky gloss.  Just a bit of transparent colour, making your lips look naked, but just better.

6. And optional, if you have time, a sweep or two of blush.

And then you’re done.  Now you can rush off to meet up with your friend, not look like you just plopped out of bed. But miraculously, you still look awesome.  🙂

I'm on the go, and ready for my errands!
I’m on the go, and ready for my errands!