Category: health

Mid Summer’s Day Dream…

~ Emmie Reve ~ Leave a comment

This summer 2023 has been a difficult one for me. With my decision to not travel and just save up for winter holidays, I feel I had inadvertently set myself up to be locked up in a slump. City life during the hot months in Toronto is not the most relaxing or pretty. Construction, sticky smoggy air, bad traffic and noise is the reality of summer in the city. I realized how some people, the “elite people”; i.e.. the well-to-do people of Toronto get to go away in their fancy cars and drive up north to the various scenic lakefront properties they own or rent. They get to have a real getaway rather easily, and spend lots of their weekends by sitting on the dock on a quiet lake and watching the waves, and just truly recharging.

I feel like this summer in particular, I had the need for escaping. But unfortunately, I could not. Certain aspects of my personal life and work life had gotten hectic; not being able to foresee this happening earlier this spring, as mid summer arrived, I was hit! I was left in a lot of emotional turmoil with no exit or break from it in sight. I did end up taking a week off of work…but then what? I thought to myself on the first few days of my staycation..This so called “vacation” ultimately would require me to work at turning off my brain and anxieties without a true physical getaway. I had to plan local outings, I had to find my friends. And on days where those options weren’t available I was truly unhappy. There is nothing worse that being on a vacation where I could not escape the boredom or malaise that was my life while it was summer in the city. I don’t have AC, so imagine me heatedly crouched over my bed post to stretch myself to the window to smoke mini cigars. That was my one of my escapes as weak as it was.

My week of being off work is coming to an end and I still think about how if I had been more privileged or luckier in life I too could have been one of those free people up at the cottage when us low folk down here have to work and toil. And if not work and toil, take staycations that are just unpaid unrelaxing wastes of times. My only solace was to splurge a bit and spend a half a day at a nice pool lounge in downtown Toronto. With no one bothering me and my surroundings being totally new, it was a lovely change from my usual routine. Sitting poolside or near any body of water always seems to calm me and the cool breeze of the rooftop pool was comforting. It made me forget some of my pains.

After that moment of solitude by the pool…I feel it is possible to have some beautiful moments in trying times…looking at what possessions and resources others had and what I didn’t was not what I should have been doing. But after a week off with some torturously boring moments where I wondered what I was doing with my life, I had the advantage of an good expanse of time; where I was able to examine my own resources and mobilize to use them. I was able to put down my mini cigar and realize that there are little pieces of paradise in the city and in our minds if we only allow ourselves to find it.

Working hard or hardly working? When at the poolside who really knows? This was my tiny escape from summer in Toronto with no cottage.

Are there rules to Make Up after 40?

~ Emmie Reve ~ Leave a comment

I have passed by countless articles and videos on social media over the past few years about how wearing and applying make-up is different for aging faces. And I never paid much attention to them, always skimming the feeds and skipping the links. The main reason is that I have just looked very youthful for most of my adulthood and did not feel the tips applied to me. My vanity and confidence in my youthful appearance would not let me entertain the idea that I maybe needed these tips…it’s not for me, I always told myself. But here I am, thinking more about it more recently. I now do see fine lines appearing, and places on my face that are a bit saggy. So what are these make up tips/rules now that I can see changes? I want to write down some of my own tips that I believe are ageless good practice, fand have nothing to do with being “over 40”.

Truth is, I don’t believe age should affect make-up application, colours or techniques, that’s too broad of a generalization. I think that changes in make up application is more personal and should be tailored. As a society that is pushing more forward with gender inclusivity, political and social awareness, the place that I feel is still left behind is the stigma with aging female bodies. Society assumes certain things about someone of a certain age. Older women especially seem to get pigeon holed into categories that are age biased and unpleasant, A “hag”, a “cougar”, “grandma”, “milf”, “pre-menopausal”…etc. Even the well meaning “mature” lady is kind of well, sucky. As one ages, skin texture does change, but instead of calling it aging skin or “over 40 skin”, it should be recognized as just a change in texture.

My Makeup Tips for Skin with fine lines and less plumpness:

  • Moisture is everything: Fine lines are actually accentuated by dry skin. Be sure to hydrate internally (drink lots of water) but also externally. Antioxidants like vitamin E oil does double duty, it hydrates and increases the suppleness of skin on an outer level. It also promotes healing from sun damage or pollution in the air.
  • Sunscreen should be in the makeup or under the makeup. Science doesn’t lie. UV rays in the sun does cause aging of the skin, dryness and fine lines.
  • Be careful with cosmetic powders. I love a pretty eye shadow colour, and setting powders to make make up last. But powders also absorb moisture and is drying in that sense. I now opt for cream eye shadows, and cream blush. And only use a light dusting of face powder over my foundation. We want a bit of shine and glow as we age, since powdery and cakey make the skin look like it is dry and wrinkly.
  • Exfoliate often: cell turn over rate slows down over the years. Help out the face by using gentle exfoliants to keep skin soft and diffuse any fine lines that may want to show up on dead skin. I like to use a lactic acid exfoliator. Super gentle.
  • Metallic shimmer is pretty, but it’s light reflecting ablity can settle into fine lines and highlight what is not smooth. Choose makeup colours that are matte or pearlescent. Much more flattering.
  • No harsh lines: eyeliner should be super soft and blended, with the exception of liquid liner to get a bold cat eye line. Otherwise, pencil liners should be diffused with a blending tool for softness. Add to the softness by opting for a charcoal grey pencil colour instead of jet black!
Mimimal powder and cream blush and cream eyeshadow. Blended eyeliner. It makes all the difference I feel these days to flatter my changing skin.

These are my tips for the small changes I see in my skin and how make-up might be adapted to better suit me. But everyone is different! I have talked to people whose faces actually get oilier as they get older and in that sense would have a different set of tips for make up. At the end of the day, just stay beautiful and take the best care of oneself possible. Be thoughtful and willing to change routines and rituals.

Get Ready with Me for a Date Night:

~ Emmie Reve ~ Leave a comment

Getting ready for “date night” is a really basic beauty ritual that needs no explaining, in my opinion. We all do it, primp and preen and get our skin glowing for that special someone. But there is actually a lot more to it that flexing our vanity and grooming muscles. There is an order and logic to it. It’s a process, so let’s talk about that process. I will start by talking about my emotional state recently and how getting ready for this one date was so interesting to me.

So I do have a boyfriend. I guess that’s what he is, considering that it we’re monogamous and it’s pretty regular that we see each other. And it’s really difficult making time for each other with our busy adult lives. And the future is always uncertain, in terms of the longevity and meaning of the relationship. I recently feared a lot of things after some revealing text messages from my boyfriend. And I didn’t know how to deal with them. I am a hairstylist in Toronto; my day to day consists of taking care of the business of looking good, and not much else. So there it was–a wall of emotions that floored me and I didn’t know what to do for days. But as a date night with my beau approached, I did what I had to do. What I always knew how to do…prep and get ready. And believe it or not, the process of selfcare and beautification really made me feel more secure of myself and what I want and was therapy in a way.

After showering I love to just relax in my robe and plan my next beauty moves. Usually it involves grabbing a tea!

The Ritual of Getting Ready:

  1. Facial Pampering: I like to do this the night before a date, or the morning of. It’s exfoliating with a gentle face exfoliator. I used Deciem’s Lactic Acid. Then applying a mask. The exfoliating makes the skin cleaner by removing dead skin cells so that it can absorb the nutrients of a moisturizing mask and expel toxins trapped within. It’s also creating the ideal canvas for make-up application. Also the best time to do my nails is the night before!
  2. Cleansing face, body and hair: I like to do this a few hours before the date: I do the whole enchilada; shampoo, condition my hair, shave, brush my teeth. After all the cleansing, don’t forget to moisturize with a nice light body lotion.
  3. Blow Dry and Style hair. My hair style depends on the formality of the night. After being apart for a while from my beau, I needed to have a more carefree, low maintenance look. This was because I wanted to create a more relaxed vibe between us after the awkwardness of the previous week and the messages. So I opted for a tousled look without flat ironing or curling. It was very natural. To achieve this I just blow dry and add a bit of serum for shine and de frizzing.
  4. Decide on outfit: Do this before putting make up on. Even if I don’t dress until right before the date, I still need to know what colors I’m working with. After choosing the appropriate outfit, for this one night I chose a lace turquoise body suit spaghetti strap tank and flare jeans. Casual but stylish attire to match my mood.
  5. Make up time: I decided since few colours didn’t clash with turquoise I would wear a smokey beige shadow with a bit of shimmer. It was perfect. Subtle, but alluring none the less. Liquid line with a pen, my usual day to day make up. Blush, brows, and lots of mascara.
I’m a fan of mascara. I truly believe that is there is one make up arsenal that really makes or breaks a look, it’s the mascara on lashes!!
Tada! The finished look. Is it possible that something so subtle and easy looking took about 2 hours? That is the mystery of getting ready!

By the time I got picked up by him, I was looking fine. Not overdone…even with all the work and prep it took. I enjoy the process. By the end of out date, after a hard couple of weeks second guessing our relationship, it felt nice that at least I always knew how to put on a good show; even if the future is uncertain with my beau. And well…it’s who I am to put my best face forward.