Category: toxic

Valentines’ Day: A day for lovers? or for loving oneself…

~ Emmie Reve ~ Leave a comment

Midwinter has set into North America and while most of us are dreaming of warmer days and the sun, this peculiar holiday of Valentines’ Day pops up. Almost as if to validate the desperate souls that hunkered down with a body earlier in the winter; even so “cuffed” couples and couples of convenience don’t count. Solidarity in friendships, family relationships/love don’t count. No the irony and pain of Valentines is to celebrate a certain kind of love: Serious LTR kinds of love. Husbands and wives, boyfriends and girlfriends. And every other kind of love can kiss it’s butt. Valentines is very exclusive, and attempts to include other types of relationships/love are often rejected–deemed as pathetic. (the way one of my girlfriends shuddered at the thought of “Galentines” Day will forever taint my mind). I will detail this holiday’s ability to exclude: At the end of the day it celebrates something that not everyone has or can have: A committed love relationship.

Getting more personal, my last Valentines was rather sad and lonely. Not because I was single, but because I wasn’t. In fact all my unpleasant Valentines fell into years where I was “with” somebody. And that says a lot. It says that Valentines reminds us that the amorous relationships we have are not always the perfect mainstream ones that are deemed as acceptable. Last year my ex only texted me “Happy Valentines” on the day of. There were no gifts, no dinner, no chocolates or flowers. Not even a hang out or make out session. It really framed how much it sucked to be in a non serious relationship, and the sting that this holiday highlights. I really cared about my ex and I’m not bitter that he didn’t take me out for an overpriced dinner, buy me flowers or jewelry. But as a make-up expert, it hurt me that I had didn’t have a reason to preen, I had no pressure at all. It left me feeling more unloved than ever. And looking into my past, even the years where I had a legitimate boyfriend, I always stressed that we would not celebrate epically enough to represent our love relationship. Feeling actually loved on Valentines days is so hard to attain, in my experience. And again, I’m not bitter, just sad and feeling like I’m missing out. Is this why this holiday was created? The exclude the uncoupled and put pressure on the coupled to buy things?

This year, I’m actually happy for once. I’m at peace and not even the slightest bit lonely or desperate. How did I get so pleasantly at ease and grateful to be single? I feel the hurt is not worth it. I am not expected to celebrate Valentines Day nor do I want to. I am so thankful for the chance to overlook it, and to watch the real, actual healthy love couples celebrate it. And I can be happy for them. Those lucky ones that have found that someone special and it means something. And I feel lucky myself. Lucky to find myself excluded from Valentines, a holiday that has eluded to give me joy even when I was in a relationship. We all need something real something to celebrate. Or not at all.   

I believe self love, acceptance and respect is where it all begins. And understanding we are whole beings even if we are not coupled. Heart shapes represent any kind of love.❤️

Doing your own nails…why it’s better…

~ Emmie Reve ~ Leave a comment

I’ve had a long relationship with doing my own nails. Ever since I was a teenager, searching for the trendiest colours, whether it be gun metal black, or a candy inspired pastel-y blue; it’s been something that as a nail art enthusiast, I’ve known all about. As a teenager, I didn’t really have the cash or the need to go to a salon to get my nails done…and as much as the thrill of getting pampered is these days now that I’m older with a ton more on my plate…one thing still stands; I want to do my own nails.  I prefer to shape, paint and design my own nails…and here’s why…

Reasons to do DIY manicures:

  1. It’s easy to do. There is a misconception that a manicurist can do it better than you. Well, maybe they are better at painting within the lines, but ultimately, all you need is: a base coat, two colour coats and a top coat. The real trick is keeping all the coats thin so they dry relatively fast…(a cool tip for setting the polish real quick? Rub each nail with coconut/olive oil for a minute after the final coat to help it set)
  2. The myth that a manicurist shapes better…this is not true. Invest in some basic nail files, coarse for shaping and fine for smoothing, and you’ll get the loveliest shapes with your nails. My go to shape? An almond shape…short on the sides and softly arced on the tips.
  3. The misconception that the quality of the polish is better: there is so much noise out there today about gel nails, seaweed nails, and all this stuff. But when it boils down to it, the salons are using the same paints that you can buy at any quality beauty supply shop.
  4. Health reasons: you can choose to buy and use formaldehyde free polishes, “three free”, and “seven free”…basically, you can get gentler products that contain less toxins in them if you really wanted to and you should for the sake of you and your nail health.
  5. Think of the health and ethical rights of manicurists/beauty workers. I recently read this scary article about how in New York City, manicures are so cheap, like less than $10 a pop, and the reason for that is not pretty: a lot of the salon workers are immigrants that don’t get paid well, and are exploited in terrible work conditions.  Not only that, but they are exposed to really toxic nail enamel solvents and chemicals and it affects the worker’s health (even their unborn babies if they are pregnant!)  I also feel like it places a big divide between more fortunate women and less fortunate ones…At the end of the day we are all people, so don’t support these back-alley nail salons.  At least go to a higher end salon that is known to treat their workers right and pay adequately for the luxury of being pampered.

Have fun with designing and creating colour combinations…I always do!

So there it is, my 5 main reasons why it’s better to DIY your manicures.  Yes, it takes more time and effort to do your own nails, but at the end of the day, they are your nails and if you want them to glow and shine…it is a creative job that should not be “outsourced”.  🙂

Asian make-up trends are coming, coming, and now here…do we want them?

~ Emmie Reve ~ Leave a comment

Japan, Korea and Taiwan have been making some super cute, funky, and pretty make-up for the last while.  I’ve noticed that here in North America and especially Canada, we are just starting to see the brands.  Asian make-up packaging are a bit different, so are the scents and formulations.  And then there are the trends: BB creams to compliment fair complexions, and false lashes to make eyes look doe-like…etc.   There is definitely a market for these kinds of aesthetics over seas but what about here?  Does Toronto’s westernized/multicultural demographic make Canada the next big market for Asian make-up companies?

Typical examples of Japanese and Korean cosmetics...I want all of these...they are just too cute!
Typical examples of Japanese and Korean cosmetics…I want all of these…they are just too cute!

It seems like we are fair game to international corporations that need to expand to survive in this global market.  Already Face Shops have sprung up everywhere, not just in the Asian malls north of Toronto, but are now in almost every mainstream mall, and just the other month, another Korean make-up heavy weight Holika Holika set up a boutique on Queen Street west.  I have yet to see really the public response, but throwing Asian make-up brands at the mainstream market without any introduction doesn’t seem very intelligent.  Face Shop for example had to buy out Canadian company Fruits and Passion here in order to set up shop.  Already they are not starting off with the most clean image as some Canadian consumers see the pop up stores as an invasion rather than them “sharing the goods” with us!  Even myself, with my Asian heritage and knowledge of cosmetics, I still find it difficult to just adopt everything the Koreans are making, just for the sake of trend or readiness.

This brand is HOT in overseas markets. Now they have popped up here, on funky Queen West. If only their customer service was better... :(
This brand is HOT in overseas markets. Now they have popped up here, on funky Queen West. If only their customer service was better… 😦

On the other hand, I guess we should be happy now that we have easier access to what is on trend at the moment, the only problem is that Face Shop make-up gives my skin allergic reactions.  My skin is sensitive, so I can’t slather on things with 10 different chemical names on it!  Perhaps these big make-up companies can stop working on gaining capitol on trends for a second, and work on better quality and formulations of their make up and skin care?  It is not too much to ask…and consumers in any part of the world’s market can relate to this need and we deserve it too.