Dress size is nothing but a number

We often hear that age is nothing but a number.  That you can do anything in your 30’s that a 20 year old can do, and that we should not limit or restrict ourselves to such a trivial things as age and such.  We can also be free to date people of all types, of all ages, of all lifestyles, and of all races.  There is encouragement to be ourselves in these matters.  The same should be said about dress sizes.  I work part-time in fashion retail, and I have recently noticed how some of us gals have strange ways of associating some part of our identity through the size clothing we wear.  If we are a size small, we are content…an extra small brings out boastful, prideful personalities.  Medium is a triumph for the more curvy types if they can get into this size label, and large and extra large are okay too, but then just don’t say it too loudly, and hope to fit into the prior.  I myself am guilty of thinking this way a bit, but now I can see why we shouldn’t think like this.

Women's sizing chart.  Why so confusing?
Women’s sizing chart. Why so confusing?

The reason is simple.  The fashion industry is fickle.  They change their measurements daily.  Different stores and different collections have different ways of fitting.  Smartset, the store I part-time in tends to have a larger sizing so that a small there is like a medium at say, Forever 21.  Also, realize that some styles actually look better looser than tighter, it all depends on how you want to style it.  In my wardrobe, I have sizes ranging from XS all the way up to M/L. And it’s nice to think nothing of it. In truth, size is really subjective, and we should not confine ourselves into thinking we are just one size.  We should not be jumping up and down when we fit a small, nor should we be bummed to size up.  Just be happy, healthy and feel great. Don’t let the industry standards have their way with you.  Larger doesn’t always mean fat.  It could also mean you’ve got a bust, and that is a good thing in this culture too.

I know some of my customers get caught up with sizes.  I’ve had skinny ladies complain and whine (in a prideful way) about how they can’t wear our pants because the double 0 just is still too big for them.  I mean, come on?  If you really liked them, they don’t have to stick to your skin for you to pull them off.  I recently lost a few pounds and have just been enjoying the extra room in some of my clothes.  It feels nice to size up too.  I’m more petite than the average woman, and I love to size up on tights.  They fit so much more comfortably, they don’t pull down, and are warmer when not stretched out.  But when we ran out of s/m tights at the store recently and I dared suggest to size up to women my size and larger, their expressions were kind of like I was insulting them!  Clothing size is nothing but a number.  Let it go.

See?  Sizes are just labels.  Don't label yourself.
See? Sizes are just labels. Don’t label yourself.

I’ll end with one last story.  I was helping a middle aged lady the other day with a particular style of sweaters that I knew the sizing ran large.  So I suggested to her to size down from her L to go for a M, medium.  She brightened up immediate with a glow of confidence.  Feeling validated from being able to grab the medium sweater, she smiled at me, and actually asked my size.  “Hey, yes, I can get away with a medium…that’s your size too, no?”  She prodded me.  I felt kind of insulted that she wanted me to define my size, the way she was defining hers in a way to make herself feel better or somehow “equal” to me.  My only reply I could think of is “well, my size, it depends, really.”  She left before I could tell her what it depended on.  I guess she was not interested in an answer that was not black or white.  But our style and personalities are never black or white, so why expect a black and white answer to the matter of dress size?  Just go with the flow and wear what fits.  Ignore the size on the tag.  If it really bothers you, cut it off when you get home and think nothing else about it.  Wouldn’t it be great to focus and put our energies on being a fabulous person instead?  That is what will put fun back into fashion.

Are circle lenses worth all the hype?

So this trend has been happening for a long while now.  Circle lenses are contact lenses worn with or without a prescription.  They usually change the eye colour and iris size, and are mostly used for cosmetic reasons and cosplay. It’s another asian make-up trend that latched on here in North America, and the goal is to make your eyes appear more dolly-like, more cute and more interesting.  Wearers and makers of circle lenses claim many things…that they enhance the eyes, play up colour and intensity, and make the eyes look bigger and brighter, more gorgeous. But do they really do all those things?  I kind of doubt how enlarging the iris (the coloured ring around the pupil) can make eyes appear larger.  More like a doll’s eyes, yes, but nothing can really make the actual eye appear “bigger”, in my humble opinion.  I think the enlarging the eyes thing is just marketing talk.

An example of how cute the culture of circle lens packaging is!
An example of how cute the culture of circle lens packaging is!

I feel the only thing that these over-seas circle lenses can do is change eye colour.  The main obstacle when choosing a coloured lens is how to balance a noticeable change while wearing them and not having it look unnatural or fake on the eyes.  I can’t wear circle lenses that are big in diameter (determines the iris size), even though they are all the rage.  That is because my eyes are small and my eye surface area to lens ratio is too great for wearing large diameter lenses. They actually look too fake on me. This has been a major bummer for me because I have to use 14mm diameter and that is very minimal iris enlargement. I’ve just been basically changing colours of my eyes.  I’ve done blue, grey and purple lenses.  Recently, I decided to try red lenses!  I got them on sale from Pinky Paradise.  1 pair doesn’t cost that much ($20-25) and shipping is reasonable.  Just don’t get addicted to these lenses and feel the need to have every colour of the rainbow.  That will rack up quite a bill quickly.

This is my natural eye colour, with no lenses.
This is my natural eye colour, with no lenses.
With redish coloured lenses.  Are my eyes more striking?  Or are circle lenses useless?
With Venus brand red lenses. Are my eyes more striking? Or are circle lenses useless?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

So what do you think?  Is the payoff for wearing circle lenses there?  or is it just better to be au naturale when it comes to the eyes?  We also need to think about how wearing contacts requires proper cleaning, care and storage, because maintaining eye health is a serious thing.  I got some unknown eye condition two years ago while using various circle lenses, and it took me months to heal.  I practiced good handling methods so til this day, I wonder if it was from frequent use of these lenses.  So in the end is it really worth all the hassle just for a subtle change in eye colour? I am still on the fence whether sporting circle lenses are as great as the trend makes them out to be or something I can go without…

The mystery of the “top knot” bun

As a  child I remember loving the Nancy Drew series…nothing intrigued me more than a good mystery and following it out as the teen-aged sleuth Nancy solved it.  The current mystery I have been trying to solve is about why every girl has been sporting a hair style known as the “top knot” these days. So I recently made an effort to make one of these things and two tired arms later, from combing my hair in an upwards direction, I finally understand.

In case you didn’t know, a top knot is a really, really high bun.  The kind that is so high, the round “bun” part is actually on the top of your head, and all your hair is pulled upwards along the face.  I had to ask myself why it has become so popular, and the go-to style for casual elegance and put-togetherness amongst women everywhere.   Because for some reason, a regular lower bun is granny-like, and unglamourous, maybe even too cerebral? But the higher top knot is alluring, fashionable and fun. Why is this great divide happening between where on the head you gather the bun?

After some thought, here is what I think:

~ Top knots are like an instant face lift.  Pulling the hair up, and out of your face has a gravity defying character that flatters and lightens up facial features such as the eyes, fore head and cheek temples.  It pulls everything up a bit.

~putting a bun at the top the head is dramatic, and adds height to a person.  It e-longens the face, making it seem slimmer and more delicate

~Because the bun part is on the top of the head, it doesn’t stick out in the back and doesn’t interfere with the line of the back of the head.  It’s smooth all the way down to the neck and swan like.

I gather and comb my hair up into a high pony tail.  fasten with an elastic.
I gather and comb my hair up into a high pony tail. fasten with an elastic.
coil the hair in a bun shape around the base of the pony tail.  Tuck in ends underneath the bun. arms tired yet? Mine were.
coil the hair in a bun shape around the base of the pony tail. Tuck in ends underneath the bun. arms tired yet? Mine were.

The second part of this mystery?  Why are top knots so hard to do in hair?  I have thick, ultra straight hair that really wants to go down in direction. The idea of making it go up is foreign.   My arms always get so tired combing my long hair in an upwards position, to wind into a bun.  But a few things really help tame hair so that it will get into place for top knots:

These are french pins.  They do not pull or tease hair.  They work by weaving through different layers of hair!
These are french pins. They do not pull or tease hair. They work by weaving through different layers of hair!

-have slightly dirty hair, or hair that has not been washed, using dry shampoo helps.  I find the added texture in your hair makes it grip as you are pushing it up.

-use french pins because they work, and do not pinch and pull hair the way bobby pins do. (French pins are awesome and so easy to use.  Ask me if anyone needs a tutorial!)

-Forget hair donuts (those spongy, foam donut shaped bun fillers used to make top knots), they are way too unnatural looking and uniform, if you get them to work–not everyone has thick enough hair to cover the hair donuts!

Am I right about why there is all this rage over the top knot?  What has been your go to hair style that never lets you down whenever you wear it?